16. Push and Pull Strategies

We spoke about hidden agendas and opportunists. For them to be successful in their objectives they need to be very good at selling - at getting you where they want you to be without raising alarm. This requires push and pull strategies which are not unlike business marketing strategies though often the mastery  can be quite advanced at a personal level. As part of ones personal growth as an entrepreneur, it is important to learn what strategies are available and how to use them smoothly because one is always  selling – It is what life and relationships are about. As the targeted ‘victim’ of a sales process it is not often clear when intentions are for good or bad. Following your gut becomes a very integral part of your interactions and business relations as well. It can save you lots. ...

As luck would have it after dropping his aunties, the van has a problem on the way back. Junior spends the rest of the day trying to fix it and is not able to contact Olu. Mzee Zablo, normally a very stingy man will ordinarily wait until the vehicle is almost falling apart before he replaces anything.  His mantra is ‘Don’t fix anything unless it’s broken.’ So the ladies arrive in Lagos but there is no one to receive them.

Tekla who had wanted them to contact Elan instead of making a surprise visit is the first to speak out – making fun in broken swahili. ‘Heeehe! Tumewezwo!’

15. Hidden Agendas

Whenever people come together for anything, there is the public, known agenda that everyone strives for. In business it could be to make money, cut costs, offer the best service and so on. But there is always the hidden agenda known only to a select few or so personal no one else is aware of it. That is the nature of any place where humans congregate. And the larger the congregation, the more diverse and varied the hidden agendas. And my family is no exception. Such agendas may not necessarily divert efforts from the known purpose of a business, but they are the backbone and reason behind office politics – as alliances are formed to move forward different agendas....

Tekla goes on to her room but the conversation outside bothers her. She would like to confront the two, but is not sure if that would be the right move at this time. Meline’s drunken husband Petro however, has no inhibitions whatsoever. He blurts out, ‘How do you quote the bible to support such evil intentions?’

Hoping no one has heard him, Meline tries to shut him up before he causes a scene. ‘Just be quiet! If you were doing what was expected of you I would not be hatching evil plans as you call them!’ He is about to make a retort but lucky for them, Junior announces:

14. Passion, Self Worth and Fulfillment

I know, you have heard it over and over again. Do what you are passionate about. But what is passion? Westerners view this as something you love to do. I view it as anything that you feel so strongly about that you cannot be still. It could be a thing you love: art, music or beauty. On the other hand, it could be a thing that causes a range of negative emotion - fear, hate or pain: for poverty, a disease and so on. You are as likely to find entrepreneurial success with any but my bet is with the negative. Chances are more likely that you are feeling and filling a glaring need in the market that people will pay for when you address their pain. Finding the delicate balance of how to translate passion, the very core of our personality to business is often a challenge and is key to your growth as an individual and entrepreneur...

Meline, Penrice, Tekla and Jenny are ready to leave for the airport. It has been an exciting two weeks with all the preparations for their travel. While they were all nervous not sure what reception they would get from their sister, they were all excited at the thought of seeing her again.

Elan had always been a very loving and forgiving person. If unhappy she would let you know and move on. No grudges. However, in the last year before she decided to leave she had been aloof. It seemed they had pushed the button too far. Each person had their own perspective of what they could possibly have done to cause such distance but no one for sure knew the hair that had broken the camels back.

13. Culture And Tradition

They say birds of a feather flock together. This is as true about business as it is about friendships. Like-minded staff, partners and clients will be attracted to working together more than those of a different mindset. employing a person of a different mind leads to their frustration. Teams learn and get to do things a certain way. I think the culture at the Elan group reflects a lot of my own values hopes and dreams. I like perfection, and hate getting involved in things I am lousy at. I am clear about what I am good at and though people around me are good at things I am not, they still share the same values. Hey, your whole world can’t be exactly like you are, that would be boring. However there are certain things they better be sharing and when I look at my team I can define that as in one word – excellence. The earnest poise, energy and innovation that go into each project are unquestionable...except those two women who Al referred. 

Now, that was a nice thought but she felt so helpless around them. She was absolutely happy to have them but was so terrified of anything going wrong. They couldn’t talk, all they could do is cry and she wasn’t sure she would be able to interpret their mode of communication. She was no expert in 'Baby'. You don’t become an expert mum or dad just because you had babies. Just like you not an entrepreneur by starting one business. Now a curious thought came to her mind. Was that why Al was suddenly interested in the office more than usual? 

12. Leadership Earned Or Imposed

It is important to understand; you cannot lead people unless they let you. There is no democratic dictatorship. One can force authority in different ways, but even in such situations, if the people have not accepted a leader, it results in a dictatorship. The two words are so contradictory, whoever thought of using one to describe the other? ….

Al, now intrigued by Dela’s change of attitude walks around the table to Dela like a lion circling his prey. However, this is only in his perspective. From Dela’s, she is not prey at all. Al, not fully aware of what could have possibly made Dela corky decides to do some research.

Al, ‘Look, Dela, perhaps there’s something you want. I will make it happen for you. But in all assurance, I will remain CEO of this group and Elan will be busy with the children. Why are you so loyal to her, anyway?’

Dela, ‘Hmmmm! So she doesn’t know you do not want her back after the break?’

Al shakes his head realizing he has given unnecessary information. However, it gets Dela talking.

Dela, ‘It’s obvious you do not know your wife as well as you should Sir. Only a fool would not remain loyal to Elan.’ She goes on passionately with a far off look on her face, obviously reflecting on something Elan did that Al is not aware of.

11. Every Character, Every Move Important

Business, similar to any strategy is a game of chess; Each character on the board is critical and every move gets you closer or further away from your goals. The problem is many people think the game starts when you get into the business, but the truth is, you are always preparing for or playing critical moves. Many also try to separate business, religious and social life, the truth is that your character and success in one will affect your character and success in another simply because in all these areas the most crucial skill is your ability to relate with other human beings – to build networks, negotiate, sell, give and as a result of all this get what you want and need in return ...

Having been asked to step out of Elan’s room, Leila and Zan wait outside at the hospital reception but soon start strolling towards the parking lot. Its approaching midday and the scorching sun makes them thirsty and hungry. Zan suggests they should go get some food and get something for Elan while at it as she does not like the hospital food.

‘What if they release her while we are away’, wonders Leila.

Zan knowingly replies, ‘No they will not.’ His sister frowns at him. What did he go do she wonders? Leila, ‘You seem so sure! wait, hope you did not tell Uncle to keep her there?’

Zan sounding defensive yet equally desperate explains that he had been worried about Elan’s continued exhaustion after the first 24hours and so had Al. When they mentioned this to the doctor, Uncle Kunle had explained the possible reasons for this and asked for extra tests which Al had agreed to. From that conversation, it was likely she would be spending at least the rest of the week in the hospital for her to rest. According to Al, if she went back home, Elan was likely to continue working through her maternity leave instead of resting.

10. Ignorance is bliss

Ignorance is bliss, there are many things I have accomplished that I possibly would never have ventured into had I known the risks and costs involved. Eventually, it has all paid off but that does not discount the difficult journey to getting to where I am. Some things I would repeat because the rewards are well worth it though I did them in ignorance not aware of the full impact of the risk I was taking. These are having my babies at an older age and leaving my country to start a business amongst Nigerians. Both risks were equally crazy and I am thankful and happy I pulled through. Not many are successful with such risks but when your gut and circumstances put you in the right place and you give it your all, providence ensures everything works together for good. Many successful entrepreneurs will tell you after hard work, doing all they knew to do right, providence or luck played a major role. So don't take your success or failures personally ...

Elan finishes talking to Dela and slowly walks to the bed. The doctor shifts his attention to his patient, after checking the clipboard at the foot of her bed.

‘Hello Elan, how are you all feeling?’

Elan is still struggling to catch her breath after the short walk from the window so Leila answers.

Leila, ‘Doc. The babies are fine but my sister here seems tired’

Afraid to be stopped from goinģ home. Elan smiles trying to look better than she feels. ‘Doctor I am fine, I suppose it is just tiredness from the whole process?’

9. Power Games

As you build your business and political networks/ relationships different people will want to be closer to you and have more influence. This leads to office politics and alliances. It is easy to separate influence when the home front and office are separate but it becomes more complex  in a family business. Often when people feel threatened, there's an unnecessary need to compete and with family relationships these are not clearly separated for example when husband and wife work together or with their children and relatives. Threats may be real or imagined and result in office politics or sibling rivalry in the home. This unhealthy competition can be controlled if there’s trust and respect. However, competition isn’t always as a result of mistrust neither is it always negative. Sometimes it brings out the best of us and more often than not births courage, confidence and innovation...

They get into the office - Elan’s office and Al goes to the coffee cabinet. He thoughtfully starts making instant coffee a thing he doesn’t like as he prefers brewed coffee. Finally, he turns to Dela and asks, rather too politely for her liking.

‘Coffee?

Dela, ‘No thanks Sir, just had some.’ She continues to observe his movements. Al finishes making his coffee and sits down while stirring it thoughtfully. He eventually speaks;

‘Dela, how long have you been with us, or rather how long have you worked for Elan?’

Dela frowns, not sure of the direction the conversation is taking. 

Dela, ‘Why do you ask?

Al nodes his head gesturing that he is expecting an answer not another question. Realising this is not exactly a friendly conversation, Dela sits up - if it is possible to straighten her back more than it already is, and answers.

8. Entrepreneur Relationships

Whoever you are there are different levels of relationship you have with the community and people around you. When running a business or in politics, the people around you form the pipelines of resources that you need to grow both as an individual and as a business. A good example in my case is Margaret, my former workmate who though we lost touch practically saved my life and business because we had a good relationship before we parted ways. But people could also serve as the pipeline to your destruction when they are a source of wrong information and toxic networks. Sometimes useful information exists in a toxic person. What does one do then?  ...

Elan is sitting at the window enjoying a light breeze coming through. She still looks tired though prim and proper despite the hospital gown. Her phone rings and as the doctor comes in. Zan goes on to speak to him while she is on the phone.
 
Elan, 'Hey Dela, how is everything going? How did the meeting go?' She is feeling more tired than she was a few minutes ago and loses her breath between sentences. While Dela realises this, whatever she has to say is very important, so she goes on. By the sound on her voice, Elan realises this so though she would rather just finish with the doctor and sit and watch the beautiful scenery, she listens on.
 
Dela, 'Quite well Ma. Mr Ugo let everyone know he will be available to manage operations moving forward'
 
Nothing extraordinary with that thinks Elan, 'Oh that’s good. Did the staff receive the news well?'

7. Too Little Too Late

Did I say Al is reliable? He has never given me a reason to think otherwise. However, you cannot always guarantee anyone's behaviour, not even yourself! This is especially true of men who society has put little expectation on. I have been a student of human behaviour for years now. I often am spot on about peoples reactions and this is good for business. However, Al is different, he pretty much is consistent, that means fewer worries and headaches for me. Being so stable himself, I wonder how he copes with me. My heart and mind rarely move in the same direction - at least not on matters of the heart; and for me, everything is a matter of the heart. May be that is why they never let me know that Zan and he were relatives. Did they also think I was I was still emotionally tied to him? Al is a good man, safe and committed unlike Zan. But again Zan in Nigeria is a very different man from the man I knew in Kenya.

Al unwraps himself from Sadia's arms, 'Excuse me, what are you doing? What are you talking about?'

He is completely lost about what Sadia is thinking. Their relationship had ended months before he met Elan. Though he had helped her get a job at E-group, it was more for old times sake than because he felt anything for her. Her sin was unforgivable as far as he was concerned, or did he make a mistake?

Sadia, 'Al I have missed you, I still care about you.'

Al, flustered and upset takes several steps back.

'So? Look I told you it is over stop this, your, you are a distraction. I am now not just married, I have kids - just KEEP OFF!

6. More Temptation

My interest in entrepreneurship started when the first shipments of yellow maize were sold in my country in the 80s. Many people did not have food yet shopkeepers were hoarding it to sell at high prices and politicians making a killing on relief food. I wanted to be the person knowing where to get the maize and getting it to everyone who needed it freely or at a price they could afford. This thinking was reinforced in high school. It's said, great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people. I never really put this to the test but learnt my lesson early. A classmate asked for my opinion on someone when I gave it she went straight ahead and told the lady. Since then, I figured, a better use of my brains was to analyse business ideas and what skills are needed in executing them ...


At Elan Group, key staff are gathered in E-oval room - their largest meeting room. Staff are talking to each other excitedly as they wait.

Olu, always amazed by her female boss's achievements cannot help herself. She starts the conversation with her two colleagues, Sadia and Gina. 'This lady is lucky o. At her age; fine man, this conglomerate, and now twins! Oh God, bless me like that o!' She lifts her hands in supplication.

Gina, always irritated at the mention or thought of Elan quips, 'What do you mean at her age?'

'Thirties now, eeeeh ... she can’t be a day older than thirty-five!' replies Olu, not sure about Elan's age

5. More Opportunists

Zan for me is one of the most perfect examples of altruistic opportunists. Maybe I was more sceptical of his intentions because we have history, but he generally knew how to take advantage of any situation and come out smelling like a rose. But that is a story for another day. What I knew for sure, very few people can remain selfless when what they desperately want is within arm's length. Then there's the ultra ego or need to impress and simple greed. My family comes in all these shades ...

The meeting in Kenya is still going on. Mzee Zablo calls the meeting to order after throwing his trump card which has pretty much worked excellently. The rest of the meeting goes on pretty much as he had planned except for the wild Swahili girl.

Mzee Zablo, 'ok ok, Yes I mean she is very, very rich. She may not be flaunting her wealth but you can tell from the activities she has been supporting and working on. I sent Musa’s son to check what was happening and he was lucky to get a job in her firm in Nairobi. He has been reporting to me regularly. It is important that we make every effort to restore the relationship with her.'

Nadia, having watched her relatives exploit her father through the years, seems to be the only one with reservations.

'Mzee, ni vizuri unavyosema. Lakini madhumuni si sawa. If we are to mend our relationship with Elan it should be because she is family. Sio eti sababu ya pesa zake - la hasha! Kila mtu lazima achukue jukumu ya jamii yake - we should let her and her family be -'

4. Opportunists

You met the cocktail of characters that is my family. Mix it with Al's family, and we have a bubbly  - a frizzy drink that will explode when slightly shaken....simply because all things remaining equal human beings are opportunists in business and in relationships. If you do not take up an opportunity presented before you someone else will. Just be sure to pick the opportunities that are inline with your intentions and goals.

Leila and Zan are busy with the babies, giggling and laughing. Elan has been talking to Al while looking outside the window. She disconnects the phone, continues enjoying the beautiful view and breeze. Zan notices she is done. Excuses himself and walks over to Elan. He puts a hand on her shoulder.

'You alright?' he asks.

Elan, 'Yes, I - '

Zan, 'You happy?'

Elan smiles though she is still feeling tired. 'Yes, I am. This is what I came to Nigeria hoping for - business, love, family - I got it all! '

Zan, 'Love? Did you really find love with him - they should have been mine you know.' He nodes at the babies and comes too close for Elan’s comfort, she flinches.

3. The cocktail of characters that is family

Meet my family. I suppose it is like any other family. Most families as you know are dysfunctional. I learnt a little late in life that perfect families as with perfect human beings are an illusion. However bad, things here have always been much better than the night I left Nairobi. Then, I thought my heart would never heal. I had been disappointed by everyone I loved and I was broke. Leila my childhood friend made it possible for me to start afresh. No one knew me here, I could walk with my head held high - well almost - though my heart was still sad and broken. Sometimes I thought about my family, especially since I learnt I would be a mother. I wondered if they ever thought about me ... it had been a long road. Not lonely, but long. Often opportunity doesn't come to you, you go out there and find it ... that's what I did then. The general financial situation brings our true nature. When younger I was very idealistic - thought family sticks by you no matter what and that in hard times people would share. However, that is not so, there are self cantered, greedy as well as generous people in each family. The illusion of African extended family is applicable only for the one considered most successful in a group till their season changes....

Elan’s relatives are gathered at the family home. Its a large homestead with six houses round a central play ground where children are playing outside and the older girls are serving tea. Some young men are playing drafts and others are busy on their phones. The homes are semi permanent built of red brick tiles. Three ladies Meline, Penrice and Nadia are taking their tea as they gossip. Chicken and goats roam freely and a cow pen is visible from this central bustle of activities.

Meline, always wanting to show how much she knows and how good she is can't help herself. 'Hmmm! that one! I was the only one she used to relate with in this family. I know her - she will not want anything to do with you guys. If, while she was just here in Nairobi she kept away, now that she is so far away why should she come close? She is very proud ...'  she sneers knowingly.

Penrice, 'He! and I hear Mzee Zablo wants us to go to her ...'

Nadia though having not met Elan in person is concerned at the direction the conversation is taking.

2. Temptations

So my husband left me to go take care of business. I am surprised that he left my side at this moment - especially with his sworn enemy in the room. Normally, Al is like a faithful pet. Whenever I am sick he is all I need. He will do the hospital rounds with me, ensure I take my medication and all that. The business has always been my headache, not his. He comes along to work more to be with me than because of a love for the hustle. In his perspective, 'a man's gotta do what a man gotta do' how I hate that phrase because to him it means he comes to work to maintain the peace! I suppose, like most young men his age, his preference would have been to continue with his football career. Probably be a football coach. For me, business is a lifeline, entrepreneurship my raison d'être. I love the difference each business makes and the jobs created. it started with me being the only employee now we have over 3000 staff and we are creating more jobs ...

Al arrives at Elan group offices still in his casual attire from the hospital. The office premises is as exceptional, as the woman behind its ideas and execution. It is spacious with large windows and exquisite décor. It holds two companies Elan Talent Management and Elan Marketing and Production. As he goes to Elan's office he greets the receptionist Olu and Marketing Manager Gina who were talking at the reception but immediately stop when they see him. They both greet him.

Gina goes 'Good Morning Sir' and Olu, 'Congratulations Sir!'. It is easy to see which greeting resonates with him most as he beams at Olu. One reason Olu is a favourite in the organisation is this, tact. For a marketing genius, Gina doesn't seem to be able to pick even the right greeting for such a beautiful day - the day he became a father!

Al, in his usual flamboyant, all so confident style replies smiling at Olu 'Morning, Thank you Olu. Gina, have you notified the managers of the meeting?'

1. A Dream Come True

I tell this story not because it's over but because my goals and dreams when I left home are fulfilled. It was not an easy road … to highlight a few things, within 24 hours I had been betrayed, lost a child, lost all I had, and to crown it all forced to leave my country. Today is a new day. It is a beautiful sunny morning and now all my dreams have come true. We had spoken about this day so many times, pictured it together so often that I had started living it even before there were any signs of hope. I sit here holding my babies and wondering which of them will want to take over from us as President of this empire we have built together ...

On a beautiful Monday morning, Elan and Al are in a hospital room. Elan is on the hospital bed looking exhausted but happy. Al props up her pillow and lays her back gently. He kisses her forehead, all the time focused on her face for any sign of discomfort or pain. He is casually dressed in a polo and slacks. Elan is in hospital clothes. Just as she gets comfortable, the nurse walks in pushing a trolley bed with two babies, Tunu and Mich the new additions to their family. Both parents beam and Elan stretches her hands to receive her babies.

Nurse,  'Congratulations! Here they are! Just perfect!'

Nurse Kate hands over one baby at a time to Elan. Hands trembling with joy, Elan then hands the baby over to Al and receives the second baby. After ensuring they are alright Nurse Kate leaves the parents brooding over their babies. A few moments later, smiling, they look at each other.

 'You made it happen!' They laugh, amused at how they said the same thing in unison.

'Well, we did it!' says Al